Sammy Obeid returned for an other stellar performance at Cubberly Theater last weekend to wow the audience with his sharp wit and ready humor.
Opening for Sammy, was Imran G, another Bay area native, who had a low key approach and elicited laughs at his take on relationships, angst against communities, and other observations. His relationship with a Jewish girl for example, had an interesting dynamic with no problems until bedtime, when she tended to “occupy” more than her share of the bed; his solution to the problem of being anti-Muslim was to unite and band against Bangladeshis and Sri Lankans. With the current emphasis on diversity and what it means in the work place, Imran recommends a brilliant solution…to have a “Diversity
Consultant” who would be tasked with providing ethnic FengShui …. an accent wall, where all people with accents are placed; put the gays in a corner, to brighten up that side of the office etc, and otherwise turn all stereotypes into positive FengShui!
On being from Pakistan, he is always bemused at being singled out at the airport lines when officers sniffed his luggage looking for “bomb juice”. On being Indian and being referred to as a “coconut”, wherein a brown dude wants to be white on the inside, what about a white guy who wants to be an Asian…could we call him an “egg”? Surely some food for thought!!
And, of course, who can stray too far from politics, so, in closing Imran’s restrained political commentary was simply that Trump can’t even deal with balding, Syria is a far cry!
To end that appreciative applause and dimmed lights, in walked, Sammy Obeid, the headliner…declaring that comedians are like vampires, so do not come out until it is dark!
Identifying himself as Lebanese-Syrian-Palestinian-Italian-American who grew up in Texas, Sammy claims his blood to be pure oil, while dealing with the after math…by the way, he is a Math major from UC, Berkeley, hence…..Who can resist having to do “problems” in Math after recess at school?
How about making Math fun, and calling it Matheroni, Matheletics…in other words, as far removed from problems as possible.
His recommendations for teaching Math in a fun way, especially at inner city schools, would be to make it relatable to students’ lives: A party with numbers is in progress when one of them knocks over a table…how irrational you say! Or, when your ex walks in with this other number, and you scream, “Y”? And when she has two of them, you consider them odd…Sammy truly had the audience in splits with his quick Mathematical wit.
Continuing with the meaning of his name, he observes that it is a complete sentence, and means “little slave of God” in Arabic! How apt! He is used to being mistaken for a terrorist, or an Indian, sometimes both…Growing up in Fremont, Sammy realized that Fremont was less urban, and more turban in its composition.
He already had five supporters vote for him in California and Ohio, maybe more, if you do a recount, and he hopes that number will double each year until the elections. He sets out to make America great again, and again, and again….apparently you can add as many agains as you want, even though it sounds unbelievable..Donald Trump’s favorite word, which actually is defined as “very unlikely to be truly”…
A few snippets showcasing his abundant wit and humor from his campaign platform:
Legalizedweed: a common side effect is increased hunger, which can prompt people to consume two rotisserie chickens, effectively killing two birds with one stone!
International relations: the Israel-Palestine conflict looms real; Sammy would, highly discourage the practice of Palestinians throwing rocks at Israel, thereby ceding even more land to the other side! His solution for them is to resort to the good old American pastime of playing baseball: with the Palestinians’ pitching arm, and Israeli expertise in stealing bases, and both parties trying to get home, it would work perfectly!
He observed that the average American needs $10,000 worth of healthcare every year, whereas, in countries like Austria, it is free. Why not fly patients to Austria on a $500 ticket…huge savings, eh? In addition, have your kids on your health insurance for life, changing Obamacare to Yomamacare.
He would want to boost the airlines industry with the slogan, “Fly high in the skies with no cries” by checking in your babies.
Make racism funny again…you can be fined if racism jokes are unfunny.
The fix for the global warming trend is…to make America cool again, by sharing the climate, and diverting hot winds to cold regions and vice versa.
About homophobia…there are 102 females for every 100 males…what would Adam and Steve do?
Just when you think you could laugh no more, comes another smart pun or situational twist. He courageously invited and accepted audience suggestions to add to his platform in his inimitable style, and some snippets of that piece are:
Gun control: arm women only…it will also take care of the pay inequalities.
Education: yes, there needs to be a system.
Immigration: we want good ones, and proficient in Math! Well, the travel ban could not stop the Taliban.
Environment: put trash in space, since space is a vacuum; use it to clean our homes!
International relations: as a comedian performing in Russia he has built a huge fan base. Problem solved.
Unemployment: Make it zero by paying off job seekers to stop them from seeking jobs.
Other tips: change WiFi password to Isis to stop neighbors from stealing it.
All in all, Sammy continued to dazzle the audience with his clean, crisp and sharp humor, drawing out the satire and wit in situations that might not appear funny to the uninitiated. It is refreshing to be treated to smart, intelligent, stand -up comedy, and EnActe, has hit a home run again by inviting these two rising stars to charm comedy lovers of Bay Area.
Archana Asthana
